Catholic laywoman and victim of violence helps to reconcile marriages in crisis
Since 2008, Gilda Fortunata G. Altez – founder of Voice in the Storm Counselling Advocacy – has handled more than 3,000 cases, including couples’ and individual sessions. Having lived with an abusive husband, she now offers psychological counselling “with God’s guidance” to those experiencing relationship crises. “Having been abused myself allows me to empathise with many wives.”
Manila (AsiaNews) – For 18 years, a lay Catholic woman from the Philippines has been helping to restore marriages through her support and counselling work. “Since 2008, I have been committed to helping save marriages in crisis,” Gilda Fortunata G. Altez, founder of the association Voice in the Storm Counselling Advocacy, told AsiaNews. To date, she has handled more than 3,000 cases, including both couples’ and individual sessions.
She has been married since 1985 – 41 years – but has spent 31 of those years separated from her husband. In 1983, she graduated with a degree in office administration from the Polytechnic University of the Philippines. She is also the author of the book *Love for all reasons, love for all seasons* (2020). Her husband provided for her and their five children, but she suffered physical and psychological abuse for many years, both before and after the separation. As the abuse escalated – as is often the case in domestic violence situations – she managed to escape from her abuser.
From that moment on, being a single mother has been a real struggle, as she raised her five children alone without any financial support. In 2008, she felt a calling to be an ‘instrument’ in helping couples save their faltering marriages and relationships in crisis. She subsequently realised that her strength came from the Bible. Over the following six months, she offered counselling with the Bible propped up on her computer screen, drawing on her ‘selective reading’, particularly when faced with especially complex cases.
“Psychological counselling has become my mission. With God’s guidance, I always seek His intervention before meeting my clients,” said Gilda Fortunata G. Altez, who offers face-to-face or online sessions, as well as informal meetings in cafés or home visits. “This mission has become my life. I cannot bear to see married couples suffering as I and their children have suffered. That is why I do everything I can to help as many couples as possible resolve their marital disputes and conflicts.”
Drawing on her experience, she shared some of the underlying causes or factors behind family breakdown. The most common factors are “infidelity” and “temptation”, to the extent that husbands become insensitive to their responsibilities and neglect the feelings of their wives and children. The worst part is that this is linked to abandonment and violence.
Her approach to restoring marriages in crisis is based on God’s grace and a willingness to help rebuild marital relationships and commitments. “The wronged party finds themselves overwhelmed by despair, a sense of mistrust and depression. Psychological counselling is the most appropriate solution to begin the healing process,” added the founder of Voice in the Storm Counselling Advocacy. “When trust is betrayed, or an act of betrayal occurs, it seems impossible to love again. You are not just hurt; you mourn what you believed to be real. But healing is possible. There is hope.”
Another approach she follows is family therapy. In her view, this method enables the mother or father to recognise the pain and trauma their children have endured in order to cope with daily difficulties. Those struggles, marked by wounds and anguish, if left unhealed, become persistent traumas that carry over into adulthood, ultimately manifesting in the way they cope with everyday life.
Nowadays, family counselling is addressing the impact of artificial intelligence. “The difference lies in the fact that we, as counsellors, understand and sense the gravity and intensity of what our clients are going through,” she explained. “Whilst AI is ‘pre-packaged’, we, of course, cannot feign emotions.”
“My humble gift to God is that I realised I needed to experience the pain of being mistreated and betrayed, so that I could empathise with many couples and wives who have been through the same experience.” Gilda Fortunata G. Altez also collaborates on networking activities with similar ministries or support groups. Since 2009, she has been a guest at various universities, radio stations, television programmes and organisations. She continues to take part in seminars and retreats to further her own development.
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